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Pronouns are words that take the place of a noun. Relative pronouns are used at the beginning of an adjective clause (a dependent clause that modifies a noun). The three most common relative pronouns are who, which and that.
Who has two other forms, the object form whom and the possessive form whose.
Which is used for animals in general or things.
That can be used for people, animals or things.
That and which are used to start two different types of adjective clauses, called essential and non-essential clauses.
That always indicates a clause that is essential to the meaning of the sentence because it defines or identifies the noun it refers to. An essential clause does not take a comma before it.
Which may also be used to introduce an essential clause.
Which is used in a non-essential clause modifying an animal or a thing. A non-essential clause is one that gives secondary, non-essential information about a noun that is already fully identified. A non-essential clause is separated from its noun with a comma:
The relative pronoun who may cause confusion because it has both a subject form (who) and an object form (whom). The key to choosing between these forms is to see what the pronoun is doing in its own clause.
Use who if the pronoun is the subject of the verb in the dependent clause.
Use whom if the pronoun is the object of the verb in the dependent clause.
Use whom if the pronoun is the object of a preposition in the dependent clause.
If in doubt, reword the clause to see which personal pronoun you need: he/him, she/her, etc. Then replace that pronoun with who or whom, using the following rule:
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